Inspiration and empowerment for women who have been left for someone else: Forget him and find someone who really does want to be with you. Read more>>

Misery loves company. That's why it's sometimes better to just be alone. Read more >>>

I Never Wanted to be the Damsel in Distress

For awhile (and even now) I'm wanting to feel more sure of my own financial situation. I realize some guys like the damsel in distress but I believe any woman with any amount of self-respect would have her own money.

That way, she knows in her heart she is with a man because she wants to be, not because of his money. I personally haven't believed in Prince Charming since approximately age seven and a half anyway.

I don't even want Prince Charming because I've actually been with that type. They are annoying. Oftentimes they say and do all the right things but they know very little about other aspects of love.

Romance is a form of love but it's not the only aspect of love that is important to me. Wit and charm and/or even good looks may get a woman to marry a man or it may get her to sleep with him, but it won't make the relationship last.  

How I Cheer Myself Up When Feeling Rejected

If a guy doesn't have feelings for me or is not attracted to me at least I know there are people who are out there that are. Now if I was only more attracted to one of those people-especially more attracted to my current boyfriend. He doesn't reject me. He actually likes me. 

My life would definitely be much easier if I could appreciate what I have right now. I would no longer need the jerks who think they are better than they really are (and I know I am repeating myself). Because then I'd at least have feelings for a person who has feelings for me and doesn't want to leave me.

And if anyone of my jerk exes wants to preach at me about how insecure or needy I supposedly am he can just “stick it.” I don't need anyone that much. I did just fine before meeting anyone I was with and I will do just find without him now.

(But if I have any reason to feel at least a little bit insecure most of my exes are the reason. Most of them actually had the nerve to think they were better than me. Still, I don't think that badly of myself.)

I guess, it would be only fair if I admit one thing though...

I never wanted to be the damsel in distress. I always believed it would be better to know I can fully take care of myself to fully appreciate any man. If a man doesn't understand that then he is the one who is insecure. More about this is in my next post. 

The Best Form of Revenge Against My Exes (Not Violence)

Continued from “I'm Sorry for Hurtful Things I've Said...”

The Best Form of Revenge Against My Exes (Not Violence)

The best form of revenge against my exes would be to marry someone twice as good-looking, three times more stable, and four times as rich as all of my exes put together. Yet, that person hopefully will actually really love me enough to want to stay with me unlike any one of the others did. And, hopefully I will genuinely love that person back.

That would teach all my exes who have ever thought I wasn't good enough-or to try to make me feel I wasn't good enough just because they were confused-a lesson. That would make up for all the pain and heartache I ever endured by the people who thought they were better than they were.

I'm trying to forgive and move on. However, I get tired of feeling like other women are better than me. I'm out to show my exes that I am fine just the way I am even if to them I was a worthless piece of crap. 

I Don't Take Rejection as Well Anymore, But I'm not Going to Live in Self-Pity

Note: I've no more hurt feelings towards all but one of my exes right now. That's progress right? Forgiveness is instant but emotional healing is sometimes a process. I don't want to hold onto bitterness.

However, I sometimes cannot help but feel hurt when I think of how worthless I felt at times when I was rejected or at least felt rejected. I have to make myself feel better somehow, don't I? Also, sometimes I just need to vent. 

I am doing this in hopes to heal from all hurts of relationships past. That way, some day I can be ready for the right person. 

Now...onto the entry...

I have to admit that I do sometimes feel bad about mean stuff I say to guys when I feel rejected by them. All I can say is I'm sorry. I guess I say hurtful things sometimes because I don't take rejection as well as I used to. Also, I realize some day if I want to be married I have to accept a person exactly as he is. 

However, being sorry and even apologizing does not mean I'm going to sit around feeling sorry for myself because someone doesn't want to be with me. Some people might think I play vindictive games, but I don't. 

That is not my intention, at least for the most part. I just want to let anyone who ever rejected me know that I'm not just some pathetic loser just because one person or another didn't choose me. I show this by proving that I am desirable by other people who actually do find me attractive.

Sometimes it can be frustrating though. There was a time when I was going to just stay single for awhile and just focus on myself. The reason why is part of me is not sure I'm good enough for the type of guys I really want to date. Then, when I know I am satisfied with myself, I know I am good enough for people other than jerks.

It's not entirely true though that I'm not good enough for nicer guys though. Not only that but when I was in college I made eye contact with a guy who I thought never would've given me the time of day in high school. It's moments like these that help me remember that I'm not really as much of a loser as some of my exes would sometimes like to make me out to be-so it seemed to me at times.

Just because one guy doesn't want me doesn't mean that there aren't three or four other guys who do at any given time. I just happen to always fall for the ones who are too unsure of themselves. Therefore, they are naturally going to be unsure of me.

And I get sick and tired of babying this type, only to find out they will still reject me anyway. That is, the ones who try to think they are better than me as a way to boost their self-esteem still reject me anyway.

They reject me because they-even though they try to put me in my place and keep me feeling worthless-feel they are not good enough. Some men just simply think that acting like a jerk is going to win me over, but eventually unlike most women it will drive me away for good.

By the way, I personally think men who do this are just huge cowards. They are the type who will also run at the sign of any relationship trouble, always on the never-ending quest for something or someone perfect. 

However, I should admit I don't take rejection as well as I used to...

I'm starting to wonder if something is seriously wrong with me. But not everything is my fault. I know I have good things to offer to the right person and one day everyone else really is going to be sorry they ever rejected me.

But my version of ultimate revenge is not violence, except for maybe some hurtful words here and there that I shouldn't have said when I was hurt. I'm sorry for that, but I'm not sorry for the next few paragraphs I am about to write in a new entry coming soon. 

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #15: My Money Should Be Enough for Her...

This is the kind of ad that perhaps should be written by an older gentleman who wants to buy the affection and company of a younger woman. It's not even about buying love and its not about buying sex either. It is about using money to control that woman who might become financially dependent on him and feel too trapped to seek out true love. See below.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #13

Run of the mill jerk looking for a woman who thinks he is a great catch because he's willing to bail her out financially whenever she needs it. I'm a great catch because I'm financially stable, but never mind the fact that I have no love to give or nothing else to offer a woman emotionally.

I am willing to give her cash as a gift and never want to be seen in public with her or never want to have to take her out. I will be willing to do overnights with a rented DVD once in awhile at my place, but I am in no way ever going to show up where she lives. Her life is boring, and this relationship is meant to be all about me and my needs, not at all about hers.